Need My Cootie Shot!

I wouldn't call myself a germaphobe.

Honest, I wouldn't!

If I had to define it, I would say that I have a healthy respect for staying far, far away from anyone carrying contagious diseases.

My policy is: I did not go into the nursing profession and I don't get paid a doctors salary; if you are sick, stay away from me! I don't love you that much and I certainly don't want it!!

Seriously, anyone who has ever thought they were doing the right thing by dragging their sick ass coming into work when they were clearly sick will tell you how I feel about this...

If you are sick - if you even think that you might be contagious - STAY HOME!! The company will still be here when you get better; in the meantime, I don't want your germs and I would appreciate it if you would keep your cooties to yourself!

Don't come around me and, if you do, prepare to be disinfected! I will spray your ass with Lysol in a New York minute!!

So, as you can see, I have a healthy respect for staying clear of people with germs.

People ask me all the time what I do when my children get sick. The answer is, I keep them home from school and quickly take them to the doctor so that they can get well soon. When they are at home, they are in their beds (and yes, sometimes they are in my bed too), getting the necessary amount of rest so that they can hurry up and get well. I usually give them lots of fluids, chicken noodle soup and regular doses of whatever medication the doctor prescribed. When they are well enough to leave their sick bed, their bedding gets stripped and washed in hot water with Lysol and their rooms get disinfected.

As you can see, I'm not such a germaphobe that I can't tend to my children when they're sick. I take care of them and give them love, but I do not hug and kiss all over them. They're sick and while I do love them that much, I still don't want to share. I'm just sayin'. ;)

So, what led to the anxiety attack tonight??? Well, it goes like this:

• Last Monday - Sugar came home from school complaining that she wasn't feeling well.
• Tuesday - she was very sick with a fever.
• I took her to the doctor and she was tested for Strep and the Flu (both negative).
• She was diagnosed as having a sinus infection.
• Wednesday - she was still feverish and started coughing
• Later that day, she started feeling better and she was back in school on Thursday.
• Saturday - Spice started coughing (Sugar was still coughing, but hers was now a dry cough).
• Sunday - Spice is coughing and has a high fever.
• Monday - Spice stays home from school.
• Mr Shell takes Spice to the doctor
• She is diagnosed as having an upper respiratory infection BUT she wants to know who's going to take her to school (this is her first year in school and she doesn't understand that she can't go to school with a fever).
• Today, Spice is back in school
• Right as I get out of my car to head into work, my phone rings
• It's Sugar calling from Middle School to tell me that she doesn't feel good. I ask her what's wrong and she says she feels like she's going to be sick. I gave her some medicine to help with the coughing this morning and she hadn't eaten breakfast so I figure that's probably what is making her feel ill and ask her to try to stick it out.
• This afternoon, when I pick her up, she's still coughing and now she's sneezing too.
• We go pick up Spice.
• We head to Walgreens to get some more cough medicine, since nothing I have seems to be helping.
• Meanwhile, she is sitting in the front seat, coughing and sneezing on me. Seriously!! I am trapped in the car with this girl and her germs, and she for real coughs. on. my. arm.
• I am completely grossed out!!
• And, as if that isn't bad enough, when I get back in the car from purchasing the cough syrup I feel her forehead and she has a fever!!!
• We get home and I take her temperature: 102!

(AND I WAS IN THE CAR WITH HER WHILE SHE WAS COUGHING AND SNEEZING ALL OVER ME!!!)

I looked like Ace Ventura, Pet Detective, riding down the street with my head stuck out the window... Okay, so maybe I am a little bit of a germaphobe after all. :(


PLEASE, PEOPLE!!! The flu season is striking early this year and it's supposed to be a bad one. If you are sick - STAY HOME!!

In the words of my youngest, "I'm for serious!"

Keep your panties on!

It’s funny how things change as you grow older. When I think back on my past, sunburn is not something that I have ever had to concern myself with.

When I was young, I used to spend every waking hour of the Summer month’s in a pool and then, in my teenage years, not only would I stay in the pool but I would dry off by laying out for hours in the sun, and NONE of this was done with any of us wearing this stuff they have nowadays called sunscreen.

Sunscreen?? The heck you say. What on earth is that??

Now, as I tiptoe up to the door of 40, I spend just a couple of hours in the water without this sunscreen stuff and I come out looking like a well cooked lobster. No wonder the dolphins all loved me so much, they thought I was food!

If you’ve ever had sunburn before, I’m sure you know how horribly uncomfortable it can be; but for me, this was a first and let me just say…OUCH!!!

It was so painful, it even hurt to wear my clothes!

Then about a week later, on top of still being terribly sensitive, you start to itch. And I'm not talking about a little, tiny, twitch of the nose type of itch, I'm talking about a tingling sensation that goes so deep, you feel like you're about to come out of your skin... and then, you do!

So here it is, a little over a week after I had been deep fried, and I was sitting in my cubical at work - itching, scratching, burning, squirming and a whole bunch of other words that end with 'ing' - thinking to myself how much better I would feel if I could go into the ladies room and remove just one, single article of extremely uncomfortable clothing.


Now, it's not often that I will write about a book that I'm reading or listening to - except as a review; but as I sat there, trying to think of inventive ways to scratch my back without causing even more damage to my already acutely delicate skin, I was reminded of the book that I had just begun listening to on the way into work this morning...



Her sister's had talked her into wearing a miracle bra and, while those things really do perform supernaturally amazing feats, anyone who's ever worn one knows how uncomfortable they can be, and that under-wire crap is a killer!

After a little while she's had enough discomfort and decides that it's not worth it, so she heads towards the ladies room to remove the offending garment only to find that both the women's and men's rooms were closed. Spotting a patch of trees surrounding the property, in the distance, she goes behind one to discreetly remove the disagreeable article of clothing. No sooner had she unhooked the latch and removed it from under her clothing than she felt the blast.

Sometime later, the policeman discovered her hidden under tree limbs and debris, caused from the jolt of the explosion, and about twenty feet away, in the branches of a magnolia tree, they found a miracle bra.

HA! That would so be my luck!

Not that I would ever be brazen enough to remove my undergarments while at work, mind you; but, I was so extremely uncomfortable that I must admit the thought of doing just that was very appealing to me.

And then, I remembered this hilarious story and decided it would be best to hang in there until I could remove the worrisome apparel in the safety of my own home, where I wouldn't have to worry that some type of traumatic event would happen, causing said undergarment to end up over the head of what would most assuredly be either a very nice looking or high ranking man. *sigh*

Note to self (and anyone else who may be reading this): Be sure to wear sunscreen in order to help prevent discomfort of this magnitude and possible embarrassment from surrendering to the very real temptations to remove any unmentionables in public places. I'm just sayin' - Keep your panties on! ;)

Summer Vacation

The Shell family had not had a vacation together in a couple of years, their children had never seen a beach, Summer was quickly coming to an end and this was going to be the youngest Shell's first year in school.



Family Vacation 2009: Panama City, FL



Day 1 - Swimming with the dolphin's:



What an amazing experience this was; so amazing, in fact, that Mr. Shell jumped into the water with his cigarette's, lighter, car keys and cell phone in the pocket of his swimming trunks.



The Shell family heads out for a two hour tour, to Shell Island, to go swimming with the dolphin's - cue theme song from Gilligan's Island.



It's an overcast day, and we're in a covered pontoon boat..



Did she think to pack the sunscreen lotion? Yep.



Did she think to put it on? Nope.



Note to self: Two things you need to remember the next time you go swimming with the dolphins: 1) Sunscreen is ineffective when it's sitting in the bottom of your purse - put the sunscreen on before you leave the hotel room. 2) Take Dramamine!



Yeah, turns out that this turtle doesn't have sea legs; she's a land turtle. A land turtle that almost got sick on the dolphins - NOT FUN! For a minute there, I thought my snorkel was going to become a blow hole. Thank goodness the nausea didn't hit me until towards the end of our two hour tour - cue theme from Gilligan's Island once more.



Second half of day 1: Rest and recuperation for momma Shell. Later that evening, after a shower and a nap, we walked around Pier Park in search of some good eats and some night time entertainment, ending the evening with a night time stroll along the beach.



Day 2 - Day at the Beach:



It's been a long time since Shelly has been to the beach and even longer for Mr. Shell; so long in fact, that Mr. Shell got into the water with his new pack of cigarette's, his wallet and the car keys in the pocket of his swimming trunks - again.



Who knew that the beauty of that water would move him to the point of complete distraction. At the beginning of this little trip of ours, he also had a tube of chap stick. We still don't know where that went; but, given his track record, I can only assume that it's somewhere in the bottom of the Gulf. Who knows, the dolphins may now be swimming around with kiss-ably soft snouts. ;)



Did she remember the sunscreen? Yep.



Did she remember to put it on? Yep.



Did they go buy an umbrella so she wouldn't have to sit in direct sunlight? Yep.



Did she stay under the shelter of the umbrella? Nope.

Her children were calling for her to get in with them and the allure of that beautiful water was too great for her to ignore.



Did the sunscreen help? Nope.

On day one, she got fried like a chicken. On day two, she got boiled like a lobster. Basically, she got cooked to a crisp!

So, the moral of the story is...

..for Mr. Shell:

1) Maybe it's time to quit smoking.

2) Be sure to empty all of your pockets before getting into the water.



...for Mrs. Shell:

1) You are not a sea turtle, a chicken or a lobster.

2) Wear your sunscreen and take your medicine.

Back-to-school

My oldest daughter is in the seventh grade this year. [GULP!]

I clearly remember our drive, nine years ago, to our very first day of school. She was going into K-4 (also known as pre-kindergarten). She has a late birthday and missed the cut off for kindergarten by a month or two. Her father and I both felt that she was too smart to continue going to day care and that she would benefit most from an early start into a big girl school.

Several weeks before that first day of school, everyone around kept telling me that I should take that day off, that it was going to be an emotional experience and to take tissues because I was going to cry.

"No way," I would tell them all. "I've been dropping her off every morning since she was six weeks old. This is just another day of dropping her off in the morning on my way to work. I'll be fine."

We woke up that morning and got her dressed for her first day of big girl school. She was so excited and looked so cute, how could I be sad on such a joyous occasion? I wouldn't; I was sure of it.

We drove to school, talking about it the entire way: discussing all the wonderful things she was going to learn and how she was going to have so much fun and how she had to listen to her teacher and obey what they told her to do. All spirits were high and then... we hit the drive to the school and, like a boldar landing on my chest, my breath got swept away and the tears started stinging the backs of my eyes.

This was my baby, she was going to big girl school, growing up right before my very eyes.

Before the tears had time time to register and no sooner than I had come to a complete stop in the chosen parking space than my big girl threw off her seat belt, grabbed her back-pack, and swung open her door, oblivious to her mommy's emotional struggles, and says "Okay, bye mommy. I love you!"

Fast forward to nine years later...

Today was the first day of kindergarten for my youngest baby and I just knew I would a wreck. I took the day off of work and had tissues ready in the event of another dreaded emotional battle.

I don't know if it was because of the difference in their personalities, the differences in their ages or the difference in the amount of drive time - almost an hour for Sugar, nine years ago, as opposed to about two minutes for Spice, today; but whatever the reason, I handled this transition much better than the first go around.

One thing remained the same though....No sooner than I had come to a stop in the chosen space, my other baby threw off her seat belt, grabbed her back-pack, slung open the car door and said, "Okay, bye mommy. I love you!"

*sniff-sniff*

My girls -fearless, or maybe it's just as Spice told her daddy today, "I'm ascited!" ;)